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The
Lightstand Magazine
1995
• March • Heirs Together - part 3
by Bro. Robin Lamplough
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Dear
John and Jane,
I hope that by now you will have had time to reflect upon
the idea I put forward in my earlier letters: that marriage
was instituted by God with the kingdom in mind. Assuming that
your silence means consent, we need now to pursue the divine
origin of marriage a stage further.
It would be useful at this point once again to consider the
Genesis record. There the comment is made that because God
introduced a special provision to end man's aloneness, 'Therefore
shall a man leave his father and his mother and cleave unto
his wife and they two shall be one flesh." (Genesis 2.24).
This statement has profound implications which we need to
explore. First of all, be clear in your minds that this is
not (as may appear from Genesis alone) an observation made
by Moses regarding God's arrangement. The Lord Jesus Christ
stated categorically that the words came from Him that made
them in the beginning, male and female (Matthew 19.5). So
they are words to be very carefully considered. What do they
tell us?
LEAVE THE PAST First of all, marriage (like baptism)
involves a new beginning: "A man shall leave father and
mother". I am sure that this is not intended to refer
only to the husband. For him and for his bride, being married
requires a leaving behind of the former life with its former
ties, its former priorities, its former loyalties. Both partners
must mentally as well as physically leave father and mother
to start a new life together as a new partnership in the community.
The parallel with baptism must not be taken too far. The new
life of the disciple calls for a renunciation of the past;
the new life of the bride and groom calls for a moving on
to another stage. But it may be that an element of renunciation
is not entirely absent. In the decisions of life, unmarried
people can in many respects quite legitimately please themselves,
whereas married people always have a partner to consider.
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The
real point is that from the decision to marry onwards, one has a
special commitment to one's partner which transcends all other commitments
except those to Almighty God. That is why it is necessary for both
bride and groom to leave the past behind.
But there
is a corollary to leaving, already hinted at in the previous paragraph.
Genesis says that a man is to leave his father and mother and cleave
to his wife. He does not leave in order to go his own way, or to
do his own thing, as the modern saying has it. God's instruction
is that leaving should be followed by cleaving. So one form of human
commitment and allegiance, that to parents, is at marriage transferred
to another, that to one's marriage partner. This does not mean that
when we marry our responsibility to our parents has ended. It does
mean that we now have another priority, the priority of marriage.
The new relationship does not replace the old but it does supersede
it. Once again there is a parallel to be observed with baptism.
PERMANENT COMMITMENT The word cleave is a strong one. It does
not speak of a temporary attachment or a passing fancy. It reminds
us of the intimacy and the closeness of the marriage bond, a bond
which transcends all other human relationships. And Genesis tells
us the outcome of this cleaving: "and they shall be one",
or, as most modern translations render it, "they shall become
one". The whole subject of becoming one is one to which we
shall be returning again and again, because it is so important.
What we need to note here is that, in the teaching of Genesis, becoming
one is the ultimate purpose of marriage. We know also from the prayer
of Jesus (John 17.11) that this is the ultimate purpose of discipleship.
So once again we are being reminded of the link between marriage
between believers and the kingdom of God.
Think about it!
ROBIN
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