THE Norwegians are expert campers. I thought I knew a lot about Norway, as I had lived there for two years. I had never been camping, however. I knew nothing about that. So, whilst I had some knowledge of the people and the language, I had no idea about life in a tent.

I had expected to have to rough it a bit. The bed would be hard. I would need lots of warm clothes. Meals would be a bit primitive. Travelling light would be essential . No doubt I would be glad of home comforts by the end.

Imagine our surprise, then, on the first night, to see the natives setting up a home from home. They were organised beyond compare. There were no picnic hampers and primus stoves coming out of their cars. Instead, out came the portable T.V., electric mixers, hairdryers and small ovens (the microwave wasn't on the market then). There was everything but the proverbial kitchen sink! Whatever the Norwegians were going to do with their weekend, doing without was not one of them!
All too easily, though, we can think that gadgets make up the home. We fall into the trap of believing that happiness depends on them. We regard them as an essential part of family life, when they are not.

Houses or Homes?
This is one of the reasons for today's tragic breakdown in marriage and family life. Many have wrong priorities. They are not aware that it was God who instituted marriage. They do not see the need to make Him the foundation of their lives. Yet the Bible says:

"Unless the LORD builds the house, They labour in vain who build it."
(Psalm 127:1)

The "house" here is not the bricks and mortar, of course. It is the family. If God is not at the foundation and heart of the family, it is destined for failure.

When God created man He did not wish him to be alone. He therefore created .woman. She was unique. Man was created from the dust. Woman alone was created from something living, from the man. Man and woman therefore belong together in a unity.

For this reason, God said, a man and woman were to be one and to stick together.

"Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh."
(Genesis 2:24)

Jesus said:-
"So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate."
(Matthew 19:6)

Men and women alone, made in God's image, have the capacity to love. This ability is not possible in the rest of the animal kingdom. It is wrong to break the promises that are made at marriage.

Men living with men and women with women was not part of God's purpose. It is strongly condemned in the scriptures. It is appreciated that some have a tendency towards those of the same sex. Just like a tendency to flare up in anger, or to impatience, such traits have to be controlled.

The Ideal of Marriage
A marriage can only really be successful when both parties see the need to make sacrifices. They must love one another so much that they are prepared to sacrifice their individuality for the marriage. They are each to love the other for their partner's sake, not for their own sake.
Husbands are to exhibit the same concern for their wives as Jesus Christ showed for the church. They must be willing, if necessary, to sacrifice their own lives for the sake of the wife. Jesus gave his life that repentant sinners might live.

Wives are to be submissive to their own husbands. There is no place in the Godly family for the misplaced values of equality. In God's design the man must take the lead with all the responsibilities that places on him. The wife must accept and encourage his leadership.

Eve was created from the side of Adam. Husband and wife are to walk side by side, helping one another. Woman was not made from the head to be the boss, nor from the feet to be oppressed. She is to be loved and respected.

God need not have placed men and women in families. He could have devised some system of communal living. He could have allowed a system in which people chose partners for sex and then moved on. He did not. God ordained marriage to produce a secure and stable background for children. The family unit is God's idea. It can only succeed when we recognise this and make Him the centre of it.

In the Old Testament Israel were brought out from slavery in Egypt and made God's people. The nation was known as the "children" of Israel. As they journeyed to the land God had promised they were carefully marshalled and grouped. They did not march in any order they chose. Their camp was no haphazard pitching of tents anywhere.

God put them in their families and tribes. Their camp was square, grouped around the tabernacle. This was God's tent in the centre of the camp. All their homes faced inwards to the things of God.

The Family Centre
Most things in Israel were done in the home. Education was not delegated to schools. There were no homes for the elderly. Things revolved around the family which took its lead from God.

Our lives today should be God-centred too. Now, as then, each member of the family has a part to play.

Father's responsibilities are based on the example of God. He is the great Provider. Father is responsible for the family. It is his family. It carries his name. He is the decision-maker. He is also responsible for the discipline, as God lovingly disciplines His children.

In God's plan of things, mother is the home-maker. She is not to be chained to the kitchen sink, but she is to "keep" the home. She must monitor the influences that enter and affect her home. They may be friends, literature, films or other things. Mum must ensure that the influences to which her children are subjected are the right ones.

Children continue the family. They bear the name and carry it on. They need to be brought up in the stability of a home where it is plain they are loved. They must learn to respect and honour parents. This is good training for respecting God and giving Him honour. Right principles are vital to their proper growth in the ways of God.

These are ideals seldom accepted today. Yet they are what family life is really all about. It is essential for happiness that the family revolves around the things of God. He has established the pattern. The failures of today are the result of ignoring this pattern.

The result of putting these ideals into practice is relationships that are stable. Families aware that happiness is not about trappings, but about God, are united and strong. 